Three Things I Wish I Had Known as a New Mom

It's everywhere you turn...mom bashing.  The relentless pursuit of judging and ganging up on each other, fueled by the media and over zealous parenting experts.  It's exhausting.  It's ridiculous and it's time that it all stopped. I don't agree with many things I see other mom's doing, however, it's not up to me.  If asked, I will state my personal opinion.  I won't offer up unsolicited advice...why?  Because when I received it as a new mom, it was akin to being thrown into a washer on spin cycle...NO FUN.

Being a new mom is a monumentally hard job as it is.  We fight post postpartum depression, nursing woes, being unable to fit into anything flattering, aches, pains, zero sleep, unsupportive partners, widening feet, hair loss, exhaustion, over touched bodies...did I miss anything?  Combine all this stress with the barrage of parenting experts and pseudo psychology experts our friends and family suddenly become when WE have a baby, it is too much to handle.

There are three key things I wish I had known the first time around.  Looking back, having a grasp on these three things would have done me a world of good and saved me a ton of mommy guilt.

1.  YOU are the expert.  You know your baby better than anyone on the planet.  Not the doctor, not the health nurse, not your mom, your grandmother, the nosy neighbor, the meddling friend...NOBODY knows your baby better than you.  If your baby is happy rolling around naked on a blanket in the middle of the summer....DO IT!  Who the hell cares if your neighbor thinks it's "inappropriate"???  DO NOT give heed to her under handed remarks designed to make you think what you are doing is wrong.  She doesn't know squat!

Ashlyn Elizabeth

2.  Parent with instinct.  If something feels right.  Do it.  If something feels wrong.  Don't do it.  If you want to sleep with your baby, do it.  If you don't, don't.  If you want to breast feed your baby til they are 17 years old (good luck with that...) go for it!  Who is better able to decide what is right for your family?  Some doofus author who either never had kids of their own, therefore is THE expert on perfect parenting?  How about the friend who only drops by to gloat about how her 3 week old is walking and talking in full sentences?  Perhaps the grim faced lady in the grocery store line that insists your baby's cry is hunger?  Ignore these people and go with your gut.  There will come a time when your instinct will be tempered with experience, until then, do what your heart is telling you to do.

Heather Grace

3.  Every kid develops differently.  If your friend insists that her child has a skyrocketing IQ, your cousin beams that her child can walk, talk, eat and do just about everything much earlier than any other human being on the planet...they are probably LYING.  I admit, I had the mom jealousy with my first.  She didn't walk until she was 13 months 7 days.  Many of my other friends sent out text messages with elated "she's walking" at 10, 11 and 12 months and I wondered what was wrong with me that my child wasn't advancing fast enough.  I worried that I wasn't doing enough flash cards, reading the right books, feeding them the right food.  All a crock of hooey!  I was doing the RIGHT thing for my family and my baby would walk, talk, eat, sleep and all that jazz when she was damn good and ready and not a moment before.

Keegan Patrick James

You see, these amazing little bundles of joy are counting on us to do ONE thing...the best we can with the best we've got.  That's it.  Everything else is just fluff.  Things were easier with my second and third.  I learned the sleepy signals, the hungry signals, the "get my damn clothes off me" signals and it was easier to deflect the under handed comments of people.

If I can give you just one word to cling to as a new mom, let me say this...LOVE.  That's all your baby really needs.  Loving them makes us desire the best for them, in everything.

Natalie

Delicious Indulgences for Moms that Won't Make You Feel Guilty

From time to time, we, as mom's just want a treat.  Something all for us.  Something we can savor and enjoy without feeling like we are "stealing" from the kids snacks or eating a million calories.  I am a master snacker.  'Tis true!  I love my snacks are am a big believer in snacking and grazing rather than eating three big meals.  It hurts my tummy and makes for a grumpy momma, so I snack...a lot.  My rear end shows the results of it!

After NOT being able to squeeze into a pair of my favorite jeans, I decided it was time to get better at my snacking.  After all, I wasn't going to quit snacking, so I better make different choices or make my way to the Mumu store immediately and ditch the wardrobe I currently had.

Here are my favorite snack indulgences and I hope you enjoy them too!

1.  Skinny Cow Strawberry Cheesecake Ice Cream.  COME ON...how can you not LOVE a product with strawberry, cheesecake and ice cream all in the title???  At only 150 calories and 1g of fat in the "tub" it is as indulgent as the "other guys" ice cream but none of the guilt!

2.  Skinny Cow Dreamy Clusters.  These turtle inspired little treats are AH MAZING!  To die for AND milk chocolate...none of that dark chocolate propaganda here!  Give me the sugary good stuff with milk chocolate any day!  Again, only 120 calories per package and 6g of fat (okay a little high...but did you know that Turtles have 4.5g of fat PER PIECE?????)

3.  Smoothies...mmmmm....adult version of a milk shake!  I am not a big fan of "diet" foods...in fact...I would rather eat my weight in celery than get on diet food...however, I have been indulging and yes, I do mean INDULGING in some smoothies and let me tell you....I drink a "butterfinger" one that is SO DANG GOOD...you would swear it has a billion calories...but it doesn't!!  I mix it up with my shake mix, some almond milk and sugar free butterscotch pudding mix and a tbsp of all natural peanut butter...OMG!!! (To be totally transparent...mine doesn't look like that but it still tastes hella good!)

4.  Chocolate Rice Cakes.  When I get a craving for something crunchy like a chocolate bar, but I don't have anything around that would be a healthy option for candy, I go to my hidden stash of chocolate rice cakes.  They are SO good!  I love the Quaker ones because they have the best non processed chocolate flavor in them.  So delicious and SO chocolatey!

5.  Sugar Free Popsicles.  For my favorite summer treat...I munch down the popsicles.  Yes, MOMMY HAS HER OWN HIDDEN BOX!!!!  So sue me!  I hide treats from my kids......Yes.  I.  Do.  I have to have something that is just for me.  The kids have freezies, goldfish crackers, granola bars, on and on and on...momma needs her fix too!  Sugar free popsicles are pretty much heaven on a stick.  Sweet, cold, tangy and all that summery goodness in one little bite!  

Every good mom has her secret stash! 

What's in Yours?????

Natalie

Five Spectacular Tips for Cleaning Your Home with Kids Under Foot

5 Spectacular Tips for Cleaning Your Home with Kids Under Foot

House cleaning is the bane of my existence.  I am sure more than one mom can identify with totally cleaning up one room…moving to the next…only to return to the original room and the kids have torn it apart…can I get an AMEN here??

There are times when I just throw my hands up in the air and say “forget it!!”  I *may* add in a curse word or two…but this is a family blog…I will exercise my filter.  I see the work I have done evaporate before my eyes and I ask what the heck I’m doing and why.

We all want a clean home.  We all want to be able to have someone drop by unannounced and not be mortified by the state of our home.  The reality is that a happy home has SOME clutter.  There are toys at the front door from being outside that day playing in the yard.  There are dirty clothes on the floor from the fifth change today because at first it was breakfast, then it was paint from finger painting, then it was dough from making cookies, then it was gloss from breaking into mommy’s make up bag…or whatever.  The truth is…a messy home can be a happy home!  Here are my top five tips to engage your kids in helping you out and making that cleaning a sliver easier on you and them.

1.      Buy baskets/boxes to collect the things in.  Tidying up got monumentally easier when I invested in some really funky fabric boxes from a local housewares store.  I bought boxes that matched my kids’ personalities.  My eldest received a hot pink one with pictures of the Eifel Tower inside.  My middle daughter received a lime green one with blue and black geometric shapes on the outside.  My son received a black and red one that looked like Spiderman…hey…I do what I can.  Every time we left the room, I simply asked them to put what they were doing into the box.  So far, it’s working well.

2.   Make use of chests and boxes.  I have two “seats” in my living room that are actually boxes.  You lift the top off and you can put things inside.  I no longer had wayward socks wandering around my living room.  They are in the box.  When my kids end up having to do “jail work” (that’s work around the home as consequence for something) I make them sort and pair socks.  The singles are always in the same place and they know exactly where to go.  You can also quickly tuck things inside them if someone shows up on a moment’s notice and you do the mad cleaning dash.

3.      One of the best kitchen things I did was to buy dishwashing liquid soap that smells AWESOME!  I bought Green Apple this last go around and my son LOVES the smell.  In fact, he offers to wash dishes now…I give him the plastic bowls and cups to wash.  The girls still grumble about it from time to time, but they do love the smell so it is less…if that’s even possible.

4.    Laundry baskets in every room.  I don’t know about you, but my kids tend to get undressed in EVERY SINGLE room of the house.  Socks, jeans, t shirts…whatever.  Sometimes it’s towels too.  Bath time ritual at our house is bathe, dry off and then get lotioned up by mom watching a tv show of their choice for 15 minutes before bed.  As bedtime is well spaced at our house that works wonders.  I can toss the towels and clothing into the basket right beside the couch and take it to the laundry room before I head to bed.  It’s also a great catch all for things like toys and such to go to the other rooms you pass by.

5.      Let the idea of perfection go!  I used to be a mom that wanted everything to be EXACT.  What I learned was that any help is HELP…so I needed to get over myself and let the kids do it almost perfect.  Does my 5 year old son make his bed the way I would make it…NO.  Does my 11 year old daughter clean the bathroom the way I would clean it…not even close.  Does my 9 year old daughter put the plastic ware away as organized as I would…Nay!  What I do see is though…it’s done.  I don’t have to do it and I resist the urge to re do it after them.  I hope that I am teaching them that life is about fun and being a happy family…not about glossy floors.

Natalie

Celebrate May 1st with MAY DAY Baskets - Created By You And Your Kids!

One of my favorite memories as a kid, was when May 1st rolled around and my sister & I were able to create, decorate and disperse May Day Baskets to the neighbors in our housing area!  Nothing brought a smile quicker than to see kids giving something they worked hard on, to people they care about!  LOVE IT!

Here are some great & adorable ideas from Pinterest...to get your creative juices flowing:

Source: goo.gl via Kelli on Pinterest

Source: familycrafts.about.com via Katrina on Pinterest

Source: grinningcheektocheek.com via Jenn on Pinterest

Source: oneshetwoshe.com via Tania on Pinterest

Feeling inspired now? 

Get your supplies, your kids, and get started! 

Trust me...the smiles you'll receive will be worth every second you invest in making a sweet little treat!

I was not paid to feature this post! I was not compensated in any way by posting about this feature!

How to Avoid the "Mom Hair" Trap

Do you remember this FAMOUS mom and her "hair" celebrity??

I admit it...I have had mom hair off and on for years. Whether it was a s a new mom or an exhausted mom of two or a shift worker to accommodate my family schedule, I have had that bad hair more than one day!

How do you get rid of "mom hair" when you are exhausted? How do you find the time to actually DO your hair when it's all you can do to use the bathroom in private? Here Re my top five tips to ditching the dreaded "Mom Hair"

1. Go get a hair cut! Go see your local salon and have someone trim those locks. A great cut can make a huge difference and give you the desire to do your hair. If finances are an issue, watch for one of those great group buy coupons! You can get a great hair makeover for less than $20 sometimes!

2. Buy a fantastic new shampoo! Choose one that smells amazing! Even those few moments in the shower, revitalized with a great new shampoo could make you want to style your hair, even just a little.

3. Check out the hair products aisle at your local drug store. There are some wonderful new hair elastics, barrettes and bands. A cute new accessory might be just the thing you need to restyle that old do.

4. Invest in some tools. I do mean invest. Spending $10 on a cheap curling iron or flat iron will simply discourage you and make your hair look worse. Fried hair is not sexy! A quality ceramic curling and flat iron can give you a beautiful hair do in a fraction of the time. A few curls at the end of a ponytail will lift that style!

5. Ask a friend to come over and help! Put in a new color! Put in a head full of curls. Get help with a more complicated ponytail or bun if you want to wear your hair up! We all need to ask for more help and helping a friend looms no feel great is an awesome reward!

What's your best tip?

Natalie